| This is the organization that is adapted to the sports or | | | | Never force your child to make a choice between |
| other activity in which a child is involved. It simply | | | | what the coach tells her to do and what you tell her to |
| means that Parents are joining up with their Kids and | | | | do. |
| the Coaches of their Kids so that these Kids have a | | | | ▸ Know the correct behavior/involvement as a |
| joyful, productive, successful, life experience. | | | | fan and parent. Cheer "Hit it," like crazy when your |
| We have all heard and seen instances of parents | | | | daughter is batting in a softball game but don't holler, |
| being out of control at sports events (hollering at the | | | | "Miss it," when your daughter's opponent in a golf |
| officials, at the opposing team members, at their own | | | | match play tournament is putting. |
| coach, and even at their own kids), or parents making | | | | ▸ Know your child's abilities to do the required |
| impossible demands of directors of the musical play | | | | skills, his/her readiness to do them, and his/her |
| ("Why doesn't my Jimmy have the lead role?"). The | | | | emotional and psychological status in dealing with the |
| basic problem underlying these kinds of behaviors is | | | | events. Can she 'dig' a moving volleyball? Is he ready |
| that those parents are mistaken about their roles and | | | | to hit a curve ball? Can she deal with losing a game? |
| responsibilities relative to the activity. Joe Smith is not | | | | Can he deal positively with winning the game? Can he |
| going to be standing on the free throw line in the last | | | | or she deal with having to sit on the bench, be hollered |
| second of the game with two chances to first tie and | | | | at, be criticized? |
| then win the basketball game. Clara Jones is not going | | | | Remember how no matter what you did with Larry to |
| to be standing in the middle of the stage singing the title | | | | "help" him take those first steps, he didn't walk until his |
| song as the curtain comes down. | | | | muscles, sense of balance, desire, and confidence |
| Smith and Jones are spectators and support people -- | | | | were developed sufficiently to enable him to |
| those are their correct roles and they must learn how | | | | accomplish the task. And, how about that toilet |
| to be responsible, caring, experts in those roles. The | | | | training? Above all, be a good parent for Judy. Protect |
| kids are the people who really count. The rest of the | | | | her from physical, mental, and psychological abuse |
| staging and we adults are there to make this work out | | | | (including your own). Constantly let her know that you |
| right for the kids, so let's make sure that whatever we | | | | love her regardless of the results of her involvement in |
| add to the activity enhances it, makes it better for | | | | the activity. Your love for her does not depend on |
| them. Here are some ideas on being an expert | | | | whether she wins or loses in a kid's game or whether |
| support person and worthwhile member of the Family | | | | she gets the lead in the school play or helps move the |
| Team: | | | | furniture on the stage. |
| ▸ Learn the rules of the game or activity so | | | | It's our responsible as parents of participating children |
| that your comments are helpful. For example, it's not a | | | | to join with activity leaders (coaches, teachers, |
| good idea to holler at the umpire when you don't know | | | | directors, etc.) so that our children/youth will have |
| the infield fly rule and he has made the correct call or | | | | positive, joyful, productive experiences. We must |
| demand that your Cindy is in the first row of the junior | | | | remember that the kids are the essential characters in |
| high school chorus when her voice quality requires that | | | | the playing of the game or engaging in the activity. We |
| she be in the back row. | | | | parents also must demand that coaches and league |
| ▸ Learn the strategies of the game so that you | | | | officials fulfill their responsibilities of being the leaders |
| don't yell at Andy to stay on his man in that basketball | | | | who create and maintain good sports/activities for our |
| game when the team is playing zone defense. It is also | | | | kids. This includes the education of us parents and the |
| good to know the 3-second lane rule. | | | | enforcement of good sportsmanship and proper |
| ▸ Learn the skills and tactics of the activity so | | | | behavior of everyone involved. |
| that you can be a positive support to the director. Don't | | | | In short, we are asking you as a parent to join in the |
| ever say, "Coach told you to grip the club that way but | | | | activity with your child so that you can take a positive, |
| she's wrong -- the overlap grip is the only right one." | | | | proactive, responsible role in the program. |